Alone Time

The girl at the checkout counter
gives me a
side-long look.
She seems bemused
by my words.
Did I say too much
or too little?
How much is ever enough?

I always liked solitude,
it’s as vital to me as food.
But five days alone is my limit,
more is too heavy a weight.
One more ounce, and I’m crushed.

I speak out loud to the mirror,
checking I still have a voice.
Sometimes I answer myself.
I sound like a rusty old clock.
I seem to be losing my tick.

I brace myself for the day
I strap on a shell,
a brave carapace,
to keep the dark moments at bay.
I’m an expert at living this way.

But when friends come to stay
and then go away
I feel that my heart
has been opened and filled
and then,
quietly,
clinically,
stripped.

Clearing House

Wisteria and heliotrope tap upon the window

Cascading canopies of blooms obscure the lace of light

These antediluvian drifting dreams needs a careful cleansing

 

Wander though the rooms

Trail a finger here along the shelves

Leaving lines behind, each one holds a story

 

The old clock with a muffled tick marks time,

A perpetual metronome to music echoed in the hall.

Polished, worn piano keys, lid closed now and silent.

 

Take a yellow dust cloth, wipe it all away

Open wide resistant, creaking window frames

Shake the dust out, flying to the stratosphere.

 

Life is not for fragile vases, balanced near the fire.

Crematorium dust belongs beneath the roses

Sheltered in rich earth.

 

At the kitchen sink, elbow deep in suds,

I recall a rubaiyat, I sense reverberation

Somewhere in my memory, a penetrating message, from Arcadia.

 

 

 

What is a Clock?

What is a clock?
A finger pointing out the time
That’s the simple answer

Counting seconds, minutes, hours
Passing slower, passing faster
A lazy, hungry creature

Time’s elastic
Drags us on
Pulls us to the future

Strips out history away
Measures out our meter
Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock

It knows nothing of the moment
Or the truth of time
It will never be my master

My clock is in my heartbeat
But what if there’s no time at all
And it’s a false illusion?

What if it repeats itself
And each beat is completer?
Or everything is overlapped?

Did we meet across some bridge,
Every meeting sweeter?
And will we pass that way again?

I’m here and there and everywhere
Without time there’s no disaster
Time is not my master