Poetry

Sonnet for Juniper

/ A. Gouedard / 3 Comments

I love you in the morning when you wake.

I love you when I wait to hear you speak.

I love you ev’ry time I glance at you.

I’ve loved you from the start. We lost our way.

All the things you felt, you didn’t say.

Through storms and floods I tried to find your hand.

Yes, loving you became a part of me.

It didn’t break. It wouldn’t go away.

When you walk in the room, I start to breathe.

I feel you all around me ev’rywhere.

My heart’s too full to speak. No need for words.

So when the day grows quiet beside the fire

I may say less then, than I said before,

but wrap you in my arms and love you more.

How Could I Love You Less

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

You were a mess,
but I loved you.
I left,
but I loved you still.

You went through denial,
anger and shock,
bereavement,
acceptance of blame.
I loved you still,
just the same.

In your pain, I saw
how hard you were trying
to work your way through your loss,
to know yourself with more depth.
I was impressed.

Now that I see how you love me,
how could I love you less

Back Again

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

The fire is laid.
The house is furnished
and here we are,
hopeful lovers,
passing by this way again.

No doubt the storms may sometimes blow.
We both still need to learn and grow.
This time though, it’s not the same.
Fear wont drive us both away.
The fire burns warm.
I fixed the roof against the rain.

This time darling,
through your tears,
you grew strong.
I couldn’t leave.
I had to stay.
You’re not alone.
We made it home.

Sorry is a useless thing

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

I blame you for this darling,
with your torments, your fears
and your floods of hot tears
and the way that you tear us apart.

I was right to turn you away
but I should have foreseen
and I should have waited
to see where the river would flow.

There were innocent victims in this
and sacrifices of love,
for, from and of,
and more than one gift that was given.

I should have seen from the start,
but lovers are so often blinded
and mostly i blame my own heart

Love Remains

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

lost love is
a severed limb
that bleeds
and seeps
and drains
lost love is
a drag in my guts
turning me inside out
a pull
a pain
a throb
lost love
is a heavy chain
until it turns back to shimmering gold
and all the loving memories,
all the ones so true,
become warm and sweet again

Crashing

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

i have been in a train wreck
slow motion
with grinding wheels
my body is shuddering
frozen
i shake in every limb
in the midst
of debris
i sit
in classic symptoms of shock
trying to think
and feel

the thing i most need
is calmness
to see the future clear

i saw you
and then you vanished

i thought it a very bad omen indeed
it clenched my heart
in fear

i told myself
this wont happen again
but it did
over and over
crashing
you kept on crashing
but you made it back
in the end

Rain Storm

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

after thunder came the rain

good times will return again

grass enriching the landscape
doesn’t look quite the same

from my window
all the things that I saw
don’t look quite the same anymore

in the desert, roses bloomed
while you sat quietly in your room

revelations can come from anywhere
but they never come too soon

Leaving (poem for Safi)

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

great things are done
where mountains meet
it’s an uphill steady climb
the road is long and strange

i met a guy
who seemed to float
above the clouds
– a beat above it all

i had a sister
clear and strong
wherever i turned
and switched
and roamed
she always came along

i had a lot of laughter too
and fine and funny friends
strangers were often kind
there was love
given and felt
but everything ends
in the end

in the end
it’s the way it goes

it’s all quite simple really
but I am still surprised
the world is very different now
through newly opened eyes
the things i saw
won’t be seen again
because they changed my life
so i cut my hair
and turned my back
on the darkness
of before

now farewell illusions
and farewell chains
hello freedom
hello truth

i won’t be round this way again
things have a natural end

touch

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

drifting in the light
of a tender touch
letting tension go
feeling so alive
taking it so slow
let the loving flow
following the curve
she’s my violin
i sense her body sing
la la la –
her skin
that’s where it begins
rolling through the arc
sliding to the bridge
touching ev’ry nerve
reaching to the edge
coming down again
swooping on her sound
flying
falling in

Shine

/ A. Gouedard / Leave a comment

my answer was always going to be no
all of my instincts said i must go
dreams are not only a thing of the night
you didn’t express it, when i was there,
when i was in pain, you were so scared,
but our purpose in life
is to travel and grow
come out from that blanket
breathe in the air

darling just shine!
look at the light