Self-Isolation

I don’t write personal stuff on my blog often (although a lot of poems are of course) but today I will break that rule

I thought I would have NO problems with self-isolation (I write, I study, I read, I go for walks, it’s fine) and I haven’t had a problem until VERY recently (after more than a month of it – started on March 15 I think). I don’t see people much anyway in normal life – my next door neighbours about twice a week (brief chats), a friend about once every 8 weeks for a coffee or some outing, visits from Aussie friends rare and very welcome, online friends every day (same as now) with no cam though, a hug now and then (lonely strangers have been known to ask me for one of those – always granted, why not). I saw my sons eyes on cam a few weeks back (very nice) but last night I was trying to write a poem about how I feel in isolation (really feel) and the only line I got was this ………..
” desperate to look in someone’s eyes, I summon Deliveroo” ….. kind of funny but pretty much true. The postman (if he brings a parcel) knocks my door and zooms on – by the time I open the door he is gone. The corridors where I live (and even the laundry room) are like walking through a ghost town. The Deliveroo guys (being mostly East European) make eye contact and do that charming little hand on heart bow some people do (I like it) but what I realised last night is I miss STRANGERS! The ones I chat to at bus stops, the checkout girl, the person who just walks up to me in the park and starts telling me their life story. I really, really miss that. Longing to see them again.

One thought on “Self-Isolation

  1. I have been alone a lot too, I miss the silly conversations with the food delivery people and the possibility of seeing better people exist, locked down with my next door bullies has been more than hell for me. I don’t see any sense of community where I live, except for the banging of pots and pans on Thursdays for the NHS staff. I have come to the conclusion the people I live around aren’t very nice at all. lol. And I would rather be alone then have them in my life. A wise man once said to me “to be alone and be happy is one of the bigger lessons of life, once you have mastered that, you are nearly there.” I think he is right. Self love is my greatest challenge right now. Bring it on lol. :) Hugs you.

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